Blood and Chocolate

BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE (Katja von Garnier, 2007)

Woe is the teenage werewolf caught between her love for a human and her community's contempt for mankind. For Vivian (Agnes Bruckner) in BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE, the dilemma is magnified. More than her lupine cousins, she knows the danger in revealing her true identity. Her childhood runs through the Rocky Mountains tipped off humans that a family of werewolves lived there. Their home was burned, and Vivian was the only survivor.

Now living in Bucharest and working in her aunt's chocolate shop, Vivian keeps to herself. Although she cherishes the freedom she feels while running in werewolf form, she loathes the beastly side that the others indulge. Vivian is approaching a critical time in coming to grips with her nature. Every seven years Gabriel (Olivier Martinez), the leader of the pack, takes a new wife. That time is soon, and everyone expects that she will be his chosen.

Complicating matters is her introduction to Aiden (Hugh Dancy). Vivian intrigues the American graphic novelist. She resists his initial attempts to strike up a romance for his safety as much as hers, but Aiden's persistence and charm wears her down. Aiden doesn't know about Vivian's heritage, but he's curious about the local werewolf legends. She feels she can trust him and shares stories. All of this angers Gabriel, who sends his son Rafe (Bryan Dick) to demand Aiden leave the country or else. Aiden refuses to heed the warning, putting Vivian in a position where she must choose between the man she loves and the secret society that has protected her.

Genre films can address serious topics in more accessible or entertaining ways than their higher minded cinematic counterparts. Based on a book for teenagers, BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE raises questions about the individual versus the group and tradition versus progress, but director Katja von Garnier is more interested in flaunting the film's lame special effects than mining its thematic potential.

Considering she must have had a limited budget, von Garnier would have been better served putting her effort into the story than the bargain basement effects work. Both suffer immeasurably. The human-to-wolf transformations aren't anything special despite the film's insistence on showing these moments over and over. The story features the most tepid romance possible and plenty of cringe-worthy dialogue. My favorite comes when Aiden sees the mess he's in by unknowingly becoming involved with a werewolf. Using his peculiar logic, he tells Vivian that if she cared for him, she should have ended the relationship before they met. Hey buddy, you were the one tracking her.

Is BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE a horror film? A romance? A teen movie? It's all of them and none of them. The horror aspect would seem the surest bet what with the werewolves and all, but the film makes no attempts to be scary. As far as star-crossed lovers are concerned, this pair is pretty boring. The main characters are at the tail end of their adolescence, but they're written as though they're older. Their ages are incidental anyway.

When a film is bad, it's easy to nitpick it to death. BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE provides plenty of opportunities. Romania is presented in an unflattering light, as if the old city were on the verge of crumbling, yet the chocolate shop is something out of a cheery middlebrow art film. The people must have their sweets. Conveniently enough, many of the signs are in English, including one identifying a building as City Cleaners. The sign isn't even necessary since we see what's inside before getting an exterior shot.

BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE ends with a whimper, going out on such a low-key note that it took a fellow critic to explain to me why the escape from the city isn't challenged. It's bad filmmaking, not restrained technique that lost me.

Grade: D-

Smokin' Aces

SMOKIN' ACES (Joe Carnahan, 2007)

Through the years the FBI has decimated the Mafia, but there's still a big fish in Primo Sparazza (Joseph Ruskin) waiting to be caught. When Vegas magician turned gangster wannabe Buddy "Aces" Israel (Jeremy Piven) gets in a bind with the mob, the feds look to him as a prime candidate to flip and nail the old boss. Sparazza catches wind of Buddy's possible betrayal and puts out a million dollar contract on him. He not only wants the smarmy entertainer dead; he also wants his heart.

The price tag brings killers out of the woodworks in SMOKIN' ACES. Buddy is in protective custody on the top floor of a Lake Tahoe casino, but the officers watching over him have no idea what's coming their way. Contract killers Georgia Sykes (Alicia Keys) and Sharice Watters (Taraji P. Henson) plan a honey trap for the hooker-loving Buddy. Mercenary Pasquale Acosta (Nestor Carbonell) will pass himself off as FBI. The Tremors, a trio of neo-Nazi thugs, intend to use brute force. Master of disguises Lazlo Soot (Tommy Flanagan) plots to get close to Buddy by posing as one of his personal bodyguards. Ex-cops turned bail bondsmen Jack Dupree (Ben Affleck), "Pistol" Pete Deeks (Peter Berg), and Hollis Elmore (Martin Henderson) will go in dressed as hotel security. FBI agents Richard Messner (Ryan Reynolds) and Donald Carruthers (Ray Liotta) are to keep Buddy safe from this full-blown, multi-pronged assault.

Writer-director Joe Carnahan trades the gritty realism of his previous film NARC for an over-the-top bullet opera riddled with dark comedy. The rat-a-tat-tat dialogue and 70s trappings of SMOKIN' ACES is pure Tarantino, although like the countless imitators, it isn't as clever as its inspiration. For all of the craziness and mayhem, it's not as unhinged as CRANK or RUNNING SCARED, films that didn't work but had some breathtaking, totally insane sequences.

SMOKIN' ACES comes closest to approaching that freewheeling lunacy in two funny scenes with Chris Pine's Darwin Tremor. His conversation with one of his dead victims, in which the corpse serves as sort of his ventriloquist's dummy, is twisted but imaginative and hilarious. The awkward nature of Lester's run-in with someone he left for dead gets milked for every last drop of humor before wrapping in the only way it could.

With a who's who cast populating the interlocking stories, SMOKIN' ACES requires an extensive amount of set-up. Three-quarters of the film, or what seems like it, involves explaining who everyone is and what they will be doing. While Carnahan does a good job of laying out the players and their tactics so that there's no confusion, the film feels top heavy with exposition. He handles the twists less adroitly, leading to a conclusion that's neither surprising nor earned.

The casual nihilism of SMOKIN' ACES gives it the detached hipness inherent in this type of film, so it stumbles badly when grasping for a moral at the end. It's impossible for a last minute pang of conscience to resonate when no loyalty to or fondness for any of the characters has been developed. SMOKIN' ACES is like a multi-player shoot 'em up video game in which the thrill comes from being bad. To finish with a flash of self-righteous humanity feels like a compromise out of step with the film's cocky strut.

Grade: D+

Catch and Release

CATCH AND RELEASE (Susannah Grant, 2007)

As if the death of her fiancé isn't enough for Gray Wheeler (Jennifer Garner) to face, she must accept that her beloved Grady wasn't who she thought he was. In CATCH AND RELEASE Gray discovers that her husband-to-be was very wealthy. He never hinted that he was rich, but as surprises go, it could be worse...and appears to be. Going through his finances turns up three thousand dollar monthly withdrawals sent to a massage therapist with a child in Los Angeles.

Unable to afford her current home, Gray moves in with her friends Dennis (Sam Jaeger), Grady's business partner at the fly fishing shop, and Sam (Kevin Smith), who finds inspirational quotes to put on herbal tea boxes. While they can give each other much needed support, emotions are swirling around the house. Dennis pines for Gray, especially when it seems that Grady wasn't as good to her as was believed. Sam feels responsible for his friend's death. Complicating matters further is that Grady's friend Fritz (Timothy Olyphant), whose presence is an unexplained irritation for Gray, is also residing there.

One day Maureen (Juliette Lewis) shows up at their Boulder, Colorado home with a little boy in tow. She's seeking some answers about Grady. Gray expects that Maureen is also looking for a sizable inheritance for the son Grady fathered with her. Despite Gray's misgivings about Maureen, she too becomes part of their family-like group.

Jennifer Garner could pull off several identities on ALIAS, but she's completely unconvincing as a grieving bride-to-be in CATCH AND RELEASE. It's as though she's still playing 13 GOING ON 30'S gawky teenager in an adult's body. Garner doesn't seem devastated so much as she's having an extended pout. During a pillow talk scene the actress delivers a misplaced honk of a laugh that is an indication she's trying too hard in the part.

While CATCH AND RELEASE is likely to put a damper on Garner's movie headlining ability, much of the film's faults can be put on writer-director Susannah Grant. The first-time director's other screenplays, including the underrated EVER AFTER and IN HER SHOES, were built around finely drawn female characters. Gray, on the other hand, is so slight that she often fades from prominence despite the film being about her growth during this painful time. (Whenever he's around, Smith's labored Jack Black impersonation pushes everyone else aside for better and, in most cases, for worse.) By the end of CATCH AND RELEASE there should be no questions about what she's learned and how she's become stronger, but the film leaves the lingering impression that she survived despite lacking fortitude.

As unfocused as the sex scene in which it looks like a kaleidoscope fell in front of the camera lens, CATCH AND RELEASE has the shaggy aimlessness more appropriate for Boulder's counterculture community. Most scenes end without purpose. Those that introduce an element to have it pay off much later--a phone call from a woman interested in Dennis and their eventual date--are scenes that should have been cut before filming began.

CATCH AND RELEASE plays as though a salvage job was attempted in the editing room, but you can't spin gold from straw. It's most apparent in a scene with Maureen giving Sam a massage. Aside from desperately hoping it doesn't go where all signs are pointing, the scene is a shambles of transitions in search of laughs. Also, how bad could Gray's big speech about the love of her life be when it's covered with voiceover?

CATCH AND RELEASE draws its title from the fishing philosophy of Gray's fiancé and buddies. The humane thing to do is throw this film back too.

Grade: D

Sweet Land

SWEET LAND (Ali Selim, 2005)

Saddled with two suitcases, a phonograph, and a nebulous grasp of the English language, German immigrant Inge (Elizabeth Reaser) comes to Minnesota to marry Norwegian farmer Olaf (Tim Guinee). Set in 1920, the couple-to-be in SWEET LAND encounters an unimagined problem in the post-World War I environment. The locals are suspicious of Germans and use their prejudice to block the marriage. In their minds Inge could be a spy or corrupter of morals. As the banker Harmo (Ned Beatty) observes, she has devious eyes.

With the wedding on hold for the foreseeable future and cohabitation forbidden by Minister Sorrensen (John Heard), Inge is placed in the home of Olaf's friend Frandsen (Alan Cumming). The bustling farmhouse is the one spot in the community where she is welcomed unconditionally. She's treated as though she were a member of the family, and Frandsen's wife Brownie (Alex Kingston) assists Inge with learning her new country's ways and language.

Although appreciative of her new friends' generosity, Inge traveled to America to take a husband. One night she slips into Olaf's house for a bath that isn't administered in front of the whole family. The next morning the quiet farmer is shocked to find her in his home, but he agrees to let her move in. She can take his bed while he will sleep in the barn's hay loft. Finally together, although not under the same roof, the couple begins their slow romance. Community opinion fails to bend at what is sill viewed as scandalous behavior.

SWEET LAND'S love story is told via flashback. Inge and Olaf's grandson Lars (Stephen Pelinski) reflects upon the history of the family homestead now that his grandparents have passed. Developers are ready to present him with a handsome $2.2 million check for the property, but the tug of the land's story makes it difficult to sell.

Director Ali Selim tells Inge and Olaf's romance in simple and modest terms while infusing it with an undercurrent of passion. The style befits the firm, hardworking characters who communicate the depth of their feelings through glances and gestures more than words. Reaser and Guinee's restrained performances hint at the interior lives that the times and circumstances would not let be shown. For modern audiences exposed to unclad bodies on a daily basis in the media, it can be hard to understand how the glimpse of an ankle might make the heart race, yet Selim and his actors make the period real and relatable.

Beautifully photographed by David Tumblety, SWEET LAND is a love story not only between two people but also humanity and nature. The golden tones of the fields and crisp blue skies reveal the glory of creation and what it provides. The film breathes when the characters are on the gorgeous natural stage and clenches when manmade obstructions interrupt it. (Note the way the camera traps Olaf and Frandsen in the frame when Olaf storms out of church after he and Inge are censured from the pulpit.) SWEET LAND values interconnectedness--in a couple, among a community, with the land, and with ancestors--and powerfully illustrates it within the story's emotional and visual content.

Grade: A-

The Hitcher

THE HITCHER (Dave Meyers, 2007)

Haven't hitchhikers gone the way of the dodo? Maybe I don't drive on enough lonely country roads to encounter people trying to thumb rides, but in this day and age, who would pick them up anyway? Whether hitchhiking is extinct is irrelevant despite the title of THE HITCHER, a remake of the 1986 film of the same name. The villain might as well be everymaniac, his preferred method of acquiring transportation aside.

Jim Halsey (Zachary Knighton) and Grace Andrews (Sophia Bush) are headed to spring break in Lake Havasu when he almost creams a shadowy figure standing in the middle of the road at night during a downpour. The man's car appears to be broken down, but rather than be good Samaritans, the freaked out couple chooses to speed away.

Several miles later Jim and Grace stop at a gas station to refuel his muscle car and themselves. He asks the clerk if he can send a tow truck, but a driver isn't available. Not long after that a rig drops off a soggy man named John Ryder (Sean Bean). The dimwitted station attendant quickly points out that this must be the guy Jim nearly hit, putting him in an uncomfortable situation with the stranger. Against his better judgment and Grace's wishes, Jim agrees to give John a ride to a hotel in the nearest town.

Sure enough, once they're on the road John pulls a knife on Grace and threatens to kill them both. They manage to wiggle out of the situation and eject John from the car, but the nightmare has just begun. The next day on the highway they see that John has obtained a lift from a family. They try to warn them, but it's too late. Jim wrecks his car. John slaughters the family and takes off. When Jim and Grace drive the murdered family's station wagon to the next populated area, they are suspected of the crime. Their worries with the law are secondary, though. John isn't done with them yet.

Too silly and stupid to be scary, THE HITCHER speeds along with no regard for logic. More thought probably went into picking the Oldsmobile 442 for Jim to drive than anything else in the screenplay. Considering the ease with which John finds Jim and Grace every time, he must have implanted tracking devices in them. If they hopped a charter plane to Alaska, one expects John would be there to greet them when they landed. He must stock multiple caches of weapons in the countryside with how well armed he is at all times. When he tries to drop a pickup truck on the college students' heads, he must have had a crane nearby as well.

Topping those howlers is a big chase, inexplicably set to Nine Inch Nails' "Closer", in which John manages to wipe out multiple police cars and a helicopter pursuing Jim and Grace. The kicker is that the couple is still believed to be responsible for the mayhem. None of the officers must have thought to report the other car. And don't get me started on the idiocy with how the final scene sets up the film's payoff.

Horror film protagonists aren't known for being Rhodes scholars, but that's what they look like in comparison to Jim and Grace. They make the worst possible decisions at every turn, which does have the side benefit of making THE HITCHER so bad it's funny. Also, the film raises the issue that it's time for a moratorium on the annoying movie habit of someone being behind the wheel while the driver's head and eyes are 45 degrees to the right.

Unlike the recent remake of BLACK CHRISTMAS and prequel THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: THE BEGINNING, THE HITCHER doesn't bother with needless backstory for John. Is it really necessary to know that the killers had unimaginably abusive childhoods, especially when such scenes are virtually the same from horror film to horror film? Omitting these scenes doesn't make THE HITCHER better, but it spares the audience from clumsy psychology. All that's essential here is that John is a killing machine.

If THE HITCHER were more interested in tone than action theatrics, it might have fulfilled its premise satisfactorily. The idea of being trapped in the middle of nowhere with a dangerous stranger has potential, but the film never gives a good sense of how isolated they are. Bad as most of JEEPERS CREEPERS was, the opening section effectively established the protagonists' distance from help. THE HITCHER is too impatient and starved for blood to let the atmosphere build.

The most frightening thing in THE HITCHER has nothing to do with the film on screen. When Grace watches THE BIRDS on the hotel TV, it's a reminder that HITCHER producer Michael Bay has long been rumored to remake the Hitchcock classic. Hopefully that's one movie murder that can be avoided.

Grade: D-

COFCA awards podcast

Last Friday I recorded this podcast with Columbus Alive's John Ross and Melissa Starker about the winners of the 5th annual Central Ohio Film Critics Association awards. I'm amazed I was awake enough to put sentences together, let alone ramble like I did, but I think it's worth a listen. I did and I knew what everyone was going to say.

Children of Men

CHILDREN OF MEN (Alfonso Cuarón, 2006)

In the year 2027, humans are no longer capable of reproducing. It has been eighteen years since a human has given birth. No explanation exists for the problem in CHILDREN OF MEN, and no hope for a solution is on the horizon. With the extinction of the human race imminent, the world goes to hell in a handbasket. Violence and depression are at record levels. One of the most popular pharmaceuticals is a suicide pill.

Theodore Faron (Clive Owen) doesn't see much reason or value to life. He smokes like a chimney and has an ever-present bottle of whiskey in his pocket. And why not? Everyone is doomed. Do what you want while you can. A resistance group led by his ex-wife Julian (Julianne Moore) promises to fatten his wallet, an enticement in good and bad times, if Theodore will transport a woman from London. Initially he is in the dark as to who this woman Kee (Claire-Hope Ashitey) is. When word slowly spreads and he sees evidence that Kee is pregnant, the stakes are raised on her life and his as they attempt to reach The Human Project and solve the infertility pandemic.

At the heart of CHILDREN OF MEN is the intriguing question of how we would go about our lives if we knew that humanity was on the brink of elimination. Whether we have children of our own or not, we go about our daily lives with the expectation of improving things for the future. If there were no future generations, would we devolve into scared, greedy scavengers?The film posits that a world we know to be finite within our lifetime is one in which we would be susceptible to fueling our fears and worst impulses. CHILDREN OF MEN'S essence is acknowledging that children are our future, literally and figuratively, although it's more substantive than a similar sentiment in a Whitney Houston song.

From a filmmaking perspective, CHILDREN OF MEN is a dazzling piece of work. Cuarón's deft direction and Emmanuel Lubezki's cinematography drop us into an immersive dystopian atmosphere. The film has already been lauded many times over for the unbroken shots that play out for minutes and for good reason. While these long takes demonstrate technical virtuosity at a mind-boggling level, the primary purpose is to enhance the reality of the environment for the audience. Whether one realizes or not that no cuts are used in the two standout sequences--an assault on a car and siege at an immigrant detention camp--the technique gives the scenes a suffocating feeling, something less easily accomplished through multiple edits. Even when not indulging single-shot scenes, Cuarón uses cuts judiciously throughout CHILDREN OF MEN, again to serve the illusion of verisimilitude.

For as bleak as CHILDREN OF MEN sounds, a vein of dark humor runs through it, both in dialogue and visuals. Kee has some fun teasing those who learn of her pregnancy and think they might have stumbled upon a new nativity story. Cuarón gets in a sly reference to a Pink Floyd album cover with the view from one character's apartment.

Invigorating in its ideas and style, CHILDREN OF MEN conceives a dystopian future, but its questions are just as relevant to our modern lives. The news is littered with tragedies. Wars rage. Fear grows. What's to keep us from chucking our best efforts? The film's answer may seem pat in words, but nevertheless, the talented people who made CHILDREN OF MEN give such hope an uncommon power.

Grade: B+

Alpha Dog

ALPHA DOG (Nick Cassavetes, 2006)

A 1999 abduction and murder case is the basis for the ripped from the headlines ALPHA DOG. Smalltime drug dealer Johnny Truelove (Emile Hirsch) and his pals, including a heavily tattooed Justin Timberlake as Frankie Ballenbacher, are up to no good in their southern California neighborhood, but Johnny crosses the line when trying to squeeze money out of someone who owes him. Jake Mazursky (Ben Foster), a Jewish neo-Nazi, can't pay up. On the spur of the moment Johnny gets the idea to take Jake's younger brother Zack (Anton Yelchin) hostage as a means of persuasion.

Johnny's gang treats Zack like a new member, and he isn't in any rush to get home. Before Zack was taken his parents confronted him about a bong they found in his room. Plus, his kidnapped status makes him the hit of the roving parties that Johnny's gang attends. It's as though no one realizes the consequences of the abduction. Zack can't just pop back in at home to clear up everything. As Johnny comes to understand what's at stake, the likelihood that Zack will be returned alive diminishes.

Like other youth gone wild films, ALPHA DOG tries to gain its immediacy by purporting to tell the gritty truth about teens today. Although the film dramatizes a specific true life case, it plays as a larger statement about amoral adolescents and their clueless, self-absorbed parents. The problem with such an endeavor, and with this film specifically, comes when it isn't grounded in any sort of reality for the average moviegoer to comprehend.

ALPHA DOG thrusts us into a world where the adults are ineffectual, if they're even around at all, and the kids roam the ranch house complexes like a pack of wolves. It's a familiar scenario in films but one that I'm guessing most audience members have never experienced firsthand. The story is coming from the streets, so it has to be honest, right? Explaining that the film is based on real characters and events doesn't release director Nick Cassavetes from convincing us that this really happened. As it stands, ALPHA DOG plays out like a hysterical vision of corrupted youth in which hip hop music and tattoos are to blame.

ALPHA DOG'S characters adopt poses that they've seen on television and in the movies, and the same goes for the young cast hamming it up as if they watched their SCARFACE DVDs too many times in preparation. Hirsch broods and puts on a menacing look occasionally, but he doesn't have enough screen time to explain why we should consider him the vilest of this rotten bunch. Timberlake acquits himself, in part because he plays the one character with any conception of the wrongness of their actions. Most of the performances are pitched over the top, particularly a twitchy Foster. When Jake busts out some wicked martial arts moves, it's hard not to break into laughter. That goes doubly for when Sharon Stone, playing Zack's mother Olivia, gives a weepy interview in a fat suit.

Stifling that response happens all too often in ALPHA DOG, a film that is otherwise dry, unengaged, and conflicted. If this weren't a true story made with the intention of nailing Johnny Truelove for his crimes, it would be freer to enjoy the youthful debauchery that it likes but resists for the sake of the message.

Grade: D-

5th annual Central Ohio Film Critics Association awards

Since I compiled nominations, set our online ballot, revealed the winners at our party tonight, wrote the press release, and sent the news to various organizations, I might as well post it here.

Children of Men and The Departed big winners in 5th annual Central Ohio Film Critics Association awards

(Columbus, January 12, 2007) Alfonso Cuarón’s Children of Men was named Best Film in the Central Ohio Film Critics Association’s 5th annual awards, recognizing excellence in the film industry for 2006. Best Film runner-up The Departed won the most awards, claiming the top spot for Best Director (Martin Scorsese), Best Actor (Leonardo DiCaprio), Best Ensemble, and Best Screenplay–Adapted (William Monahan).

Other individual winners include: Helen Mirren for Best Actress for her portrayal of Queen Elizabeth II in The Queen; Dreamgirls’ Eddie Murphy and Jennifer Hudson in the supporting performance categories, with Hudson also winning Breakthrough Film Artist; Actor of the Year Clive Owen for his exemplary work in Children of Men and Inside Man; Apocalypto’s Dean Semler for Best Cinematography; Rian Johnson for Best Screenplay–Original for Brick; and Babel’s Gustavo Santaolalla for Best Score.

Other honored films include: An Inconvenient Truth for Best Documentary; Pan’s Labyrinth for Best Foreign Language Film; Cars for Best Animated Film; and Brick for Best Overlooked Film.

Founded in 2002, the Central Ohio Film Critics Association is made up of film critics based in Columbus, Ohio, and the surrounding areas. Its membership consists of more than 25 print, radio, television, and new media critics. COFCA recently launched its official website at www.cofca.org, which contains links to member reviews and past award winners.

Winners were announced at a private party on January 11.

Complete list of awards:

Best Films
1. Children of Men
2. The Departed
3. Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
4. Pan’s Labyrinth
5. Little Miss Sunshine
6. Brick
7. United 93
8. Babel
9. Thank You for Smoking
10. Casino Royale

Best Director
-Martin Scorsese, The Departed
-Runner-up: Alfonso Cuarón, Children of Men

Best Actor
-Leonardo DiCaprio, The Departed
-Runner-up: Sacha Baron Cohen, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Best Actress
-Helen Mirren, The Queen
-Runner-up: Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada

Best Supporting Actor
-Eddie Murphy, Dreamgirls
-Runner-up: Alan Arkin, Little Miss Sunshine

Best Supporting Actress
-Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls
-Runner-up: Rinko Kikuchi, Babel

Best Ensemble
-The Departed
-Runner-up: Little Miss Sunshine

Actor of the Year (for an exemplary body of work)
-Clive Owen, Children of Men and Inside Man
-Runner-up:Leonardo DiCaprio, Blood Diamond and The Departed

Breakthrough Film Artist
-Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls
-Runner-up: Sacha Baron Cohen, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan and Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Best Cinematography
-Dean Semler, Apocalypto
-Runner-up: Guillermo Navarro, Pan’s Labyrinth

Best Screenplay – Adapted
-William Monahan, The Departed
-Runner-up: Alfonso Cuarón, Timothy J. Sexton, David Arata, Mark Fergus, and Hawk Ostby, Children of Men

Best Screenplay – Original
-Rian Johnson, Brick
-Runner-up: Michael Arndt, Little Miss Sunshine

Best Score
-Gustavo Santaolalla, Babel
-Runner-up: Nathan Johnson, Brick

Best Documentary
-An Inconvenient Truth
-Runners-up (tie): Jesus Camp and Wordplay

Best Foreign Language Film
-Pan’s Labyrinth
-Runner-up: Letters from Iwo Jima

Best Animated Film
-Cars
-Runner-up: Monster House

Best Overlooked Film
-Brick
-Runner-up: The Descent

COFCA offers its congratulations to the winners.

For more information about the Central Ohio Film Critics Association, please visit www.cofca.org or e-mail info@cofca.org.

The complete list of members and their affiliations:

Kevin Carr (www.columbuScene.com, www.7mpictures.com) ; Nick Chordas (The Columbus Dispatch), Bill Clark (www.fromthebalcony.com); Nikki Davis (Columbus Alive); John DeSando (90.5 WCBE); Johnny DiLoretto (Fox 28 WTTE); Chad Dull (The Other Paper); Frank Gabrenya (The Columbus Dispatch); Jordan Gentile (The Other Paper); Kaizaad Kotwal (C Magazine, Gay Peoples Chronicle); Kristin Dreyer Kramer (NightsAndWeekends.com); Joyce Long (820 WOSU); Rico Long (820 WOSU); Clay Lowe (90.5 WCBE); Colin Mack (U Weekly); Hope Madden (The Other Paper); Paul Markoff (WOCC-TV3); David Medsker (Bullz-Eye.com); Neil Miller (www.columbusmovieguy.com); J. Caleb Mozzocco (Donewaiting.com); Lori Pearson (Kids-in-Mind.com, critics.com); Mark Pfeiffer (Reel Times: Reflections on Cinema; WOCC-TV3); Margaret Quamme (The Columbus Dispatch); Dave Redelberger (WLVQ, WHOK, WAZU); John Ross (Columbus Alive); Melissa Starker (Columbus Alive); Peter Tonguette (freelance); Jason Zingale (Bullz-Eye.com).

Freedom Writers

FREEDOM WRITERS (Richard LaGravenese, 2007)

In FREEDOM WRITERS, idealistic new teacher Erin Gruwell (Hilary Swank) steps into Room 203 at Woodrow H. Wilson High School in Long Beach, California ready to shape young minds and turn around troubled lives. The bright daughter of a civil rights activist, Erin chose education over law and an embattled integrated school over a cushy suburban institution because she wanted to help at-risk kids before they were beyond help.

Based on a true story, FREEDOM WRITERS takes place in the aftermath of the Los Angeles riots stemming from the Rodney King case. Racial tension and gang violence is high, and most of Erin's students are caught in the mix.

Her first day on the job provides a wake up call to the challenges she will face in the classroom and from the administration. Fourteen-year-olds with rap sheets and reading levels far below their ages dominate Erin's freshman English class list. Department head Margaret Campbell (Imelda Staunton) scoffs at her optimism in spite of it all, making sure to remind her that she shouldn't wear her pearls around students for whom she's a glorified babysitter. The outlook doesn't improve when she meets the students, a surly bunch who divide themselves along racial lines and whose only unity is in detesting their cheerful teacher.

Erin tries to earn the students' respect by approaching them on their level, but the teens know she can't relate to their lives even if she uses a Tupac song to teach them about internal rhyme. She achieves a minor breakthrough when they play a game that lets the rival groups discover how much they have in common.

Real progress comes when the students are given diaries to write their own stories. Erin leaves it up to each one whether she is permitted to read their work. To her surprise, all of them choose to share. The stories of living with fear and violence touch her deeply, and she feels compelled to show the kids something outside their experiences. Whether it's buying them new books, something Margaret refuses to supply because she believes they'll destroy them, or paying to take them on a field trip, Erin invests her time and money to demonstrate her belief in their worth.

It would be easy to write off FREEDOM WRITERS as another inspirational teacher movie, not to mention one in which the white character saves the minorities, but to do so would be unfair. Writer-director Richard LaGravenese follows the template for such a story. The difference in FREEDOM WRITERS is how he shades the familiar elements.

Erin's devotion and effort--she takes on two part-time jobs to pay for books and the class trip--approaches sainthood, but it is not without a high price. Her husband Scott (Patrick Dempsey) grows frustrated that his wife is becoming a stranger to him. Unfair as it might sound to force her to choose between him and her students, LaGravenese sets the scene so that Scott's ultimatum seems perfectly reasonable. Erin wants to change the world. While she might gain admiration and a terrific sense of accomplishment, it takes a rare spouse who is willing to sacrifice and be left on the sidelines, especially when that wasn't expected.

The students' stories are told without excessive sentimentality. The audience is smart enough to observe that the kids have hard lives and don't need to have it jammed down their throats. If there's a weakness in FREEDOM WRITERS, it's in having too many students to get to know many of them well. Still, it's better to have characters we'd like to know more about than not have the slightest interest in. Eva (April Lee Hernandez), a gang murder witness pressured to lie to protect a fellow Latino, gets the lion's share of the attention. The film does a good job of explaining why lying to frame someone else is the more sensible decision.

I would have liked to have seen more about Marcus (Jason Finn). His mother kicked him out of the house for being in a gang, and he doesn't expect to reach his eighteenth birthday. There's something quite moving in how he talks about what The Diary of Anne Frank means to him and how Miep Gies, who hid Anne, is his hero. His shy request to escort the elderly Dutch woman, if they can raise the money to bring her to speak to them, is one of the film's high points.

Occasionally FREEDOM WRITERS overdoes it in depicting those who oppose Erin. Margaret and a junior honors teacher have their villainous mustache-twirling moments that aren't necessary. To Staunton's credit, she plays the part not as an overt racist but as someone who has seen failure for so long that it's easier for her to doubt that Erin's progress will have a lasting effect. Erin can come across as hopelessly optimistic, although I suppose without such an attitude, she would never take the big risks. The teacher's shoes fit well on Swank, who conveys the toughness and affection her character must have to weather the situation and make an impact.

In 1961 the Freedom Riders stood up for what they believed was unjust regarding civil rights in America. In honor of those people, Erin's students adopt the name Freedom Writers for their brave stance against the violence in their communities and the low standards expected of them. Similarly, FREEDOM WRITERS echoes its inspirational teacher cinematic predecessors with generous amounts of compassion.

Grade: B

Code Name: The Cleaner

CODE NAME: THE CLEANER (Les Mayfield, 2007)

In CODE NAME: THE CLEANER Jake Rodgers (Cedric the Entertainer) wakes up in a hotel room next to a dead FBI agent and a briefcase containing $250,000. Not only doesn't he remember how he got there, but Jake has also forgotten who he is, even his name. The painful head wound is the likely culprit for his amnesia, but Jake knows enough that he better hightail it out of there before someone finds him.

In the hotel lobby Diane (Nicolette Sheridan) greets Jake and claims to be his wife. He can't determine if she's telling the truth or not, and he doesn't really care when she brings him home to a mansion. Diane seems overly concerned about restoring his memory, though. Jake overhears her conversation with a doctor and thinks better of sticking around to find out if she is (and he is) who she says.

Jake has little to go on to remember his identity. He has intermittent flashbacks that suggest he's a special ops combat veteran, but the only physical clue he has is a hotel claim check ticket that produces a keycard for Digital Arts, a Seattle video game company. Stopping for a bite to eat at a diner across from Digital Arts, Jake encounters Gina (Lucy Liu), a waitress who claims to be his girlfriend and contradicts everything Diane told him.

If only Jake's loss of memory was extended to those seeing CODE NAME: THE CLEANER. This dire comedy deserves to be dropped in a vat of solvent to remove its stink. Directed by Les Mayfield, who helmed the equally horrendous THE MAN with Samuel L. Jackson and Eugene Levy, CODE NAME: THE CLEANER doesn't contain jokes so much as desperate flailing for attention.

Whether you think Cedric the Entertainer is funny or not is irrelevant. The best comedian couldn't get laughs from the skeletal humor. CODE NAME: THE CLEANER is a series of brainstormed ideas--Jake steps on a broken lamp, Jake hits golf balls into a residential area, Jake dances with a Dutch troupe--and little more. The performances aren't anything special, but maybe they're better than believed. How else can the actors deliver this crap with a straight face?

The mystery of Jake's true identity frustrates more than intrigues and takes an inordinate amount of time to set up. This isn't MEMENTO. The flimsy script, which incredibly has two credited screenwriters, takes more than half of the film's running time to establish first act information. We don't need to know the secret of who Jake is, but it would be nice to have some idea of what's going on rather than getting obvious misdirects. This is supposed to be a comedy instead of a thriller, not that it satisfies the expectations of either.

CODE NAME: THE CLEANER should have the alias The Watch Checker. It's one of those movies where you strain to check the time and despair that you're only twenty minutes in, then thirty-five minutes in, and so on.

Grade: F

The History Boys

THE HISTORY BOYS (Nicholas Hytner, 2006)

Having successfully completed their A level exams, the students in THE HISTORY BOYS turn to preparing for the arduous admissions process to England's top universities. Cutler Grammar School's headmaster (Clive Merrison) wants his star pupils to be accepted by Oxford and Cambridge, so he brings in a pliable teacher to get them to focus on the task at hand rather than advancing their knowledge.

Young, thin as a rail, and fixated on the result rather than the process, newcomer Irwin (Stephen Campbell Moore) stands in stark contrast to Hector (Richard Griffiths), a corpulent old professor who stresses the importance of learning regardless of its daily utility. The boys adore Hector's freewheeling lessons, but they find more of that time is being pinched so that Irwin can inculcate them in how to play the admissions game to their advantage.

Hector's dissatisfaction with reduced instructional time takes a back seat when word reaches the administration that he was seen touching one of his student's gentials while giving the boy a ride home on his motorcycle.

Confirming everything that Morrissey and Belle & Sebastian songs would have you believe about what boys do at British schools, THE HISTORY BOYS takes place in a universe in which homosexuality and a teacher's wayward hands are no big deal. Although there are no indications that the film exists as a fantasy, it can be viewed in no other way. As enlightened as students might believe themselves to be today, it seems unlikely that every teenage male in a class would be gay or curious, let alone be so open in 1983.

The main trouble spot for THE HISTORY BOYS, though, is the laissez faire attitude, if not outright endorsement, regarding an instructor inappropriately fondling students and the pupils' unquestioning acceptance and implied enjoyment of it. Hector's students accept his grabby-handed motorcycle rides as though it's their duty in return for the education he's giving them, sort of like a rite of passage. In the end THE HISTORY BOYS wonders what all the fuss was about and winks at Hector's indiscretions as if they were no more than harmless pranks.

It's too bad that the film loses its way because THE HISTORY BOYS asks some interesting questions about what to learn and how to use it. Should education be pursued for its own sake, or is it only of value if it can be used to further oneself professionally? Proficiency tests and school funding are the hot topics in today's American educational system because it's felt that the exams serve no other purpose than satisfying bureaucratic requirements and that the money should be applied to teaching practical knowledge over learning that provides cultural enrichment. Is there value in taking contrarian stances in academics because the novelty is more likely to get one noticed, and is it intellectually dishonest? Like the best teachers, THE HISTORY BOYS puts such questions out there for the viewers to gnaw on and draw their own conclusions.

Director Nicholas Hytner works hard to make the stage play seem more kinetic on screen, whipping the camera around the classroom in an attempt to add motion to a script that demands stasis. In a middlebrow, theatrical way, Alan Bennett's dialogue is sharp and consistently amusing, which aids the film through its slow portions. THE HISTORY BOYS falters badly in a plot development near the end. Along with its questionable approval of the teacher's actions, the film is unable to recover. That's how it can go. A sterling career--or, in this case, a solid film--can be undone by one or two bad lapses in judgment.

Grade: C

Rocky Balboa

ROCKY BALBOA (Sylvester Stallone, 2006)

More than any other athletes, boxers are the ones who seem not to know when to hang it up for good. In ROCKY BALBOA Sylvester Stallone’s fiftysomething fighter comes back for one more tussle in the ring (and a sixth film), but he’s one former champ who holds no illusions of reclaiming the heavyweight title of his youth.

By all appearances Rocky should be a happy man. Years after his heyday he remains a beloved figure in his hometown. He runs a successful Italian restaurant named for his deceased wife and entertains his diners with tales of his boxing glory. For all the love he receives from the people of Philadelphia, Rocky still aches over the loss of Adrian and the distance that exists between him and his son Rocky Jr. (Milo Ventimiglia), who wants to escape the long shadow his famous father casts.

Rocky has no reason to believe he’ll ever fight again, but a strange thing happens when ESPN runs a virtual simulation pitting him in his prime versus current heavyweight champ Mason “The Line” Dixon (Antonio Tarver). The sports TV segment stirs something inside him that makes him want to go toe to toe with another boxer again. Nothing major, just some local fights if the state boxing commission will approve.

Everyone thinks Rocky is foolish for such a pursuit, but Dixon’s handlers, desperate to polish the tarnished image of their unpopular titleholder, jump at the chance to arrange a high profile exhibition between the pugilists. Rocky will get one last hurrah in the ring, and Dixon will improve his reputation with the sport’s fans. Of course, even if it is an exhibition, Rocky is determined to give it everything he’s got this one final time.

There’s no reason to believe Rocky could come close to holding his own against a much younger fighter, yet when the boxing scenes arrive, the urge to cheer him on is impossible to resist in this unabashedly corny film. The past decade at the movies, not to mention the diminishing returns of ROCKY sequels, hasn’t been particularly kind to Stallone, so it’s remarkable how quickly he endears himself to us as the title character.

The triumph of Stallone’s performance is in the dignity he brings to Rocky. After years of taking punches to the head, Rocky may not be the brightest bulb in the room, but he has a good heart. He comps meals for a needy former boxer not out of pity but because he believes it's the right thing to do. That makes you want to root for Rocky in whatever he does.

Although the big fight is a major part of the film's second half, ROCKY BALBOA'S interest is in exploring middle age and coming to grips with the reality that life is entering the latter rounds. Rocky knows that he's becoming a relic. He prefers listening to oldies on the radio and reminiscing about how the neighborhood used to be. While sweet, his delicate flirtation with Marie (Geraldine Hughes), who he once knew as a girl, is as much about finding the love he lost when his wife died. Stallone's screenplay is savvy enough to observe that Marie is aware of this fact as well. Rocky and Marie's tentative steps toward one another provide grace notes to a film in a series better remembered for jabs and knockouts.

ROCKY BALBOA possesses a keen awareness of the potentially foolhardy nature of the character's quest. In an achievement befitting the boxer, Stallone delivers a sucker punch in finding a way to make this underdog comeback story succeed.

Grade: B-

Night at the Museum

NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM (Shawn Levy, 2006)

Hard up for work, Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) accepts a position as night security officer at the Museum of Natural History. His first night on the job Larry discovers that the late shift will be much more rigorous than the occasional stroll through the exhibits with plenty of time for reading books and catnapping. When the sun goes down in NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM, the displays come to life.

An Egyptian tablet in the museum's collection transforms the wax and taxidermied figures into living, breathing beings overnight, but if any exhibits are outside when the sun rises, they turn into sand. It is Larry's responsibility to keep the peace and ensure that none of the inhabitants leave the building. With a playful Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton to amuse, a diorama battle between cowboys and Roman soldiers to mediate, and a mischievous monkey to keep in line, Larry has his hands full. Former President Teddy Roosevelt (Robin Williams) helps show Larry the ropes, but ultimately he will have to take control of the situation, even the Easter Island head slinging insults and the fierce mini-Mayan warriors.

Heavy on special effects and Stiller's shtick, NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM is a big, silly comedy with a little something for everyone in the family. The effects work is integrated well into this museum adventure, but it doesn't overshadow the basic slapstick and funny performances from which the film gets its humor. The broad screenplay might have hampered lesser comedic actors, but Stiller tailors his role so that there's some intelligence peeking out of the doofus he's playing. He would have been better off dropping the belabored scene in which he psychoanalyzes Attila the Hun (Patrick Gallagher), though.

The most fun in NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM is found in the supporting cast. As the crusty security guards forced into retirement, Dick Van Dyke, Mickey Rooney, and Bill Cobbs are a treat to watch as they needle Larry and stir up trouble. The irascible Rooney is hilarious as he itches for a fight with Larry. Steve Coogan and Owen Wilson, as the Roman Octavius and a gunslinging cowboy, make their scenes snap with humor from the strength of their personalities slicing through the middling jokes. Ricky Gervais puts his unique twist on the uptight twit running the museum.

NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM is more amusement park ride than a walk through the halls of history, but sometimes a slap fight with a monkey is preferable to a lesson on Sacajawea. The film has a lighthearted nature and the good sense to keep things simple. Most films would have devoted time to a seemingly inevitable romance with Larry and a docent played by Carla Gugino, but NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM understands that such matters are unimportant when the main attraction is the zaniness that ensues when history exhibits come alive.

Grade: B-

Central Ohio Film Critics Association takes to the web

I'm pleased to announce the launch of the Central Ohio Film Critics Association site. It went live late this afternoon.

The site will be a resource for finding out what films are opening in Columbus and what local critics have to say about them. It also includes past awards winners and member profiles, although there are still some, myself included, who have yet to submit this information.

I'm thrilled to see the idea realized. Thanks to Paul Kramer for programming the site, Bill Clark for designing graphics, Kristin Dreyer Kramer for suggesting that we could do something more than the bare bones blog I was planning, and all of the membership for chipping in a few bucks to give the group some money to make it happen.

Happy Blogiversary

Today this blog turns three years old.

With the number of films I've seen in the last two weeks and this month overall, it's amazing I remembered, although I confess I did have to look at the first post to get the date right.

The general insanity of everything this year produced a slow stretch where I didn't post much. I still have a lot of reviews backlogged that may or may not ever see the light of day on ye olde blog, but I've been better about getting the most recent ones up (and in a timely manner). I definitely had a period of writer's block, so if some of the writing seems substandard, I'd probably agree with you. I do feel like I've rebounded in the last couple months, so hopefully everyone's happy.

I'm most pleased with redesigning the look of the site, which took a lot more time than was necessary, but the book I checked out of the library was just partially helpful in taking me through major template changes.

My reviews have become longer because of how I've chosen to incorporate this blog into my writing process. For all intents and purposes, I would consider this my primary outlet. After all, more people read this on a daily basis than likely see the television show I've been doing for nearly ten years. I've been writing for the web first and paring down the reviews for TV. I think it's improved the quality of my work, but you'll be the judge of that.

Of course, I never get as much written as I would like, but I can only expect so much of myself. I may be a fulltime critic, but it's not how I make a living. I'm lucky to have it incorporated into my job, though.

I've been writing online since June 2000 when Levi Wallach was looking for DVD reviewers at DVDMon.com. I wrote like a madman for that site for a couple of years. My work is still posted there if you're interested in reading it. While I never intended to break off from his site, starting this blog effectively made that transition. I'm grateful to him for giving me a space to publish online at a time when I hadn't the foggiest idea how to do any HTML coding. (Not that I'm a genius at it now...)

This year I started writing for Kristin Dreyer Kramer at NightsAndWeekends.com. Some of my work there is republished from here, but I've also taken a stab at a book review, a game review, and humor writing. It's been nice to mix things up a bit writing-wise. I appreciate her interest in publishing my work, and I'm glad to help out a friend. (The amount she writes on a weekly basis is very impressive.)

Whether you're here for the first time or have been checking in since I started, thanks for stopping by. All writers want their work to be read even if, when all is said and done, I write for myself. As aggravating and time-consuming as it can be, I love doing it. Hopefully you find some value in it too.

Charlotte's Web

CHARLOTTE'S WEB (Gary Winick, 2006)

E.B. White's classic children's book CHARLOTTE'S WEB and the 1973 animated film get a CGI polish for this live-action version. Farm girl Fern (Dakota Fanning) saves the runt of the litter from the ax when she promises her father to take care of the tiny pig. She names him Wilbur and totes him around like those little dogs that fashionistas carry as accessories.

Although small, Wilbur (voice of Dominic Scott Kay) becomes too big to keep around the house, so Fern must take him nearby to stay in her uncle's barn. The animals there are not inclined to play with the enthusiastic little pig, and they certainly do not want to break the news to him that the spring pig will not see the winter snow.

Wilbur finds a friend in Charlotte the Spider (voice of Julia Roberts), and what a fine friend she is. When Templeton the Rat (voice of Steve Buscemi) informs Wilbur that he is intended for the Christmas dinner table, Charlotte works to ensure that her friend will be around for many winters to come.

I've grown tired of the loud and crass films that pass as children's entertainment, so it's wonderful to come upon a gentle film like CHARLOTTE'S WEB that values storytelling over spectacle and selflessness over self-centeredness. Director Gary Winick paints the film with picture book colors and populates it with adorable talking animals. Aside from a flatulence joke or two, this is a film rooted in traditional kids' literature without coarsening, dumbing down, or modernizing.

Kids (and adults) may be diverted for awhile by whiz-bang effects, but in the end nothing can grab attention like an enchanting story. White's timeless book deserves a great deal of the credit, but screenwriters Susannah Grant and Karey Kirkpatrick have done an excellent job in keeping the adaptation clean and simple. CHARLOTTE'S WEB is a beautiful tale of friendship that spoons out the virtues of kindness and generosity without a medicinal taste. The characters and the film are invested with common decency, but the film is anything but stodgy. There are many funny moments, such as Wilbur's insistent attempt to get out of the pen, that lighten the heavier themes.

CHARLOTTE'S WEB is also about death being a part of life. The scenes that illustrate this lesson won't leave a dry eye in the house. The last fifteen to twenty minutes of the film are a masterful tearjerking demonstration that brings the end of one character and a sad yet joyful beginning for some new ones. The pivotal conversation cuts between the characters, getting slightly closer each time, until the emotional charge is almost too much to bear. It's presented in a matter-of-fact manner yet is as moving as anything I've seen on film all year. Although happy, the denouement is shattering, not from any big gestures but rather from the delicacy with which Winick makes the point. Parents may be hit harder than children, who may wonder why the adults are getting choked up, but the film opens a door to talk about a difficult issue for kids to understand.

The voicework is first-rate, particularly Roberts' sensitive embodiment of Charlotte. She delivers her lines with quiet, dignified grace, transforming the creature with a scary exterior into something extraordinarily lovely because of what's inside. Kay is very good too as the humble pig. He brings the right amount of youthful optimism and energy to the part. Thomas Haden Church and André Benjamin add humor as the voices of scarecrow-fearing crows.

Humility is a valued trait in CHARLOTTE'S WEB, but there's nothing untoward about the rest of us praising this film's greatness. CHARLOTTE'S WEB has heart and intelligence, qualities that combine for a transcendent time at the movies.

Grade: A

The Holiday

THE HOLIDAY (Nancy Meyers, 2006)

In THE HOLIDAY two lovelorn women on opposite sides of the Atlantic Ocean swap homes to escape heartbreak for Christmas. Iris (Kate Winslet) is determined to erase the last traces of her lingering affection for Jasper (Rufus Sewell), a former boyfriend and currently engaged co-worker who's been leading her on for years. Amanda (Cameron Diaz) wants to forget her fresh break-up with Ethan (Edward Burns).

Eager to leave Los Angeles, Amanda comes upon a home exchange website with a listing for Iris' cottage in Surrey. The women chat online, confirm for one another that there are absolutely no men where each hopes to travel, and agree to trade places.

Iris can't believe the enormous pad Amanda inhabits, but the sun and space is just what she needs to stop thinking about England and the man who has broken her heart many times. Amanda wasn't expecting something so small and off the beaten path, but at least the location should minimize the chance of running into any guys.

Just when they're ready to stop looking, fate intervenes and delivers men who may be perfect for both women. Iris' brother Graham (Jude Law) doesn't know that his sister is away and drops by her home one night to crash after some barhopping. Amanda is attracted to him immediately. She and Graham vow to enjoy their brief time together and leave it at that, but it quickly becomes apparent that Amanda is falling for him.

Meanwhile, Iris has two men enter her life. She befriends Arthur (Eli Wallach), Amanda's elderly screenwriter neighbor, and develops feelings for Miles (Jack Black), a film score composer who works out of Amanda's house. Once again, Iris looks to be setting herself up for disappointment as Miles is dating an actress.

THE HOLIDAY doesn't reinvent the romantic comedy, but writer-director Nancy Meyers understands two of the keys to making a successful film in the genre. First, the romantic comedy can be predictable, but it shouldn't be contrived. The love affair's escalation and destination is rarely within doubt. That's OK. Ultimately the appeal of these films is wanting and knowing that everything will turn out okay for the couple. Just don't make it seem like we're marking time until the happy ending. Whatever you do, don't have someone running to the airport to catch the other person before he or she leaves forever. You can be predictable and creative.

Second, and more importantly, we need to fall in love with the characters. It helps a lot if they are relatable rather than stock figures. Plus, how can we believe two people should be together if we don't like one or both? This doesn't rule out fights or misunderstandings between the romantic leads, but don't insult us. Put a credible obstacle between the lovers, not the tired device of a cataclysmic misunderstanding that could be cleared up in a second but ends up driving the entire second act because the characters never talk.

In a sense, Meyers' film succeeds because it doesn't make missteps. Only someone watching a romantic comedy for the first time would not be able to foresee where things are leading, but THE HOLIDAY works its magic because Meyers invests time in the characters instead of the scenarios. Iris' friendship with Arthur is a real surprise because it precedes (and possibly supercedes) any romantic involvement she has with Miles. Winslet shows us the good soul inside Iris and makes her someone to root for before she's met a man who might win her heart. Diaz's performance is inconsistent--she's too flighty and cutesy--yet we get to know her enough to see her decency underneath the immature surface.

The men of THE HOLIDAY fare well also. Law is suave and lovable, but there's more than meets the eye with Graham. Meyers wisely lets us make assumptions about him, just as we do in assessing people in an instant in real life, and then reveals his depth. Law is a classic romantic lead, but he really sparkles in his scenes with children. In a nice turn, Black tones down his shtick. There's nothing "real" about THE HOLIDAY, but the friendship and more that grows between Miles and Iris feels more organic than the love at first sight that romantic comedies often peddle.

THE HOLIDAY is a blissful reprieve from the depressing, portentous films that dominate this awards-conscious part of the movie season. A little love and warmth is always appreciated, especially when it comes in as delightful a package as this film does.

Grade: B

The Pursuit of Happyness

THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS (Gabriele Muccino, 2006)

Being a good, hard-working person who loves one's family should be all that it takes for a lifetime of joy. Sadly, it doesn't always work out that way. In THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS Chris Gardner (Will Smith) is all those things. He breaks his back day in and day out in 1981 San Francisco trying to sell the portable bone density scanners in which he sank his life savings. Unlike his own dad, he's a good father to his son Christopher (Jaden Smith) and loves his wife Linda (Thandie Newton).

Yet each day is a struggle. Chris' business investment hasn't been as lucrative as he expected. Doctors like his product but don't consider it a necessity. The meager income he and his wife make isn't really enough to pay the monthly bills or their outstanding taxes.

One day Chris observes the smiling faces of people flowing into and out of an office building. What could they be doing that has them flush with cash and happiness? He learns that they are employed at a stock brokerage firm, one that also happens to be accepting applications for a six-month internship program. Chris has always been good with numbers, so he jumps at the chance to make a career switch that will make him more capable of providing for his family.

Linda isn't as enthralled with his plan. Since Chris has no experience as a stock broker, she believes he's wasting his time applying for a spot in the competitive program. As both of them later learn, the internship is unpaid. Upon completion only one of the twenty interns is likely to earn a job with the company. It doesn't take a math whiz to see that the odds don't favor Chris.

He is undeterred, but Linda cannot take it any longer. She follows through with her threat to leave Chris but agrees to leave their son with her husband. As if life weren't urgent enough before, now he must fulfill the role of two parents while working even harder to sell the remaining scanners to sustain them during his internship at Dean Witter.

The common struggles of working people are rarely shown in major Hollywood films without some embellishments to glamorize poverty, usually in imbuing the poor with special wisdom about what's important. Such techniques might make audiences feel better, but these narrative devices can feel dishonest. Based on a true story, THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS is a feel-good film with plot conveniences that stack needless burdens on the main character, but it takes great care to show how difficult it can be to pull oneself up. Shot with muted colors on a finer grain film stock, the images have a grittier texture. In story and style THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS also sounds a faint echo of the Italian neorealist tradition. (Chris' hand-to-mouth living and constant setbacks recall UMBERTO D.)

As Chris hopes to change the trajectory of his professional life, THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS serves a similar purpose for Smith. The happy-go-lucky star of several blockbusters remains as affable as ever, but here Smith trades his usual suaveness and stylishness for gray-flecked hair, work clothes, and lower class living conditions. The change looks good on him and benefits the film. As Chris, Smith radiates decency radiates even in the most dire circumstances.

The key scene in THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS and for Smith's performance arrives in one of those ridiculous movie conventions when the wrong events converge. The day before the most important interview of his life Chris is hauled into the local precinct because of unpaid parking tickets. He spends his last dollars to take care of them, but he must be kept in a holding cell until the check clears the next morning. Of course, that's not long before his internship interview. And yes, because Chris was painting his apartment when he was detained, he's raggedly dressed and splattered with paint. Chris impresses the interviewers and convinces the audience that he could do so because Smith comes across as humble, intelligent, and composed while obviously being in desperate need of the opportunity.

Smith's charisma appears to have been passed along to his son Jaden, who plays his child in the film. The younger Smith gives a relaxed performance that is cute but not overly precocious.

What THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS lacks in surprises it compensates for in heart. It won't take two guesses to determine how Chris' story turns out, but it's gratifying to see him chase survival and exceed his expectations.

Grade: B

Home of the Brave

HOME OF THE BRAVE (Irwin Winkler, 2006)

In December film critics hibernate in theaters and screening rooms. Studios compete to get their contenders in front of the nation's movie writers in time for consideration on year-end ten best lists and by critics' groups. It's a frantic time with multiple screenings per day on consecutive days. Inevitably a few films slip through that studios are fooling themselves if they think their products are award worthy. *cough* BOBBY *cough*

Take HOME OF THE BRAVE, a drama that observes the difficulty four Army enlistees serving in Iraq have upon their homecoming to civilian life. The Irwin Winkler film strives to be the first defining movie about the struggles of Iraq veterans returning to an indifferent country, but it's hard to believe anyone can watch it with a straight face. HOME OF THE BRAVE is so ham-fisted in its attempts to wring pathos from the vets' problems that it plays like an overwrought parody of an award bait movie. Something this serious shouldn't be so consistently and unintentionally funny.

Before leaving on a humanitarian mission, the soliders learn that their company's deployment ends in two weeks. This is like a movie cop going on a call on the last day before starting retirement. You know something will go terribly wrong, and in HOME OF THE BRAVE it does.

The vehicle Vanessa Price (Jessica Biel) is driving is hit by an IED, and she loses her right hand. Tommy (Brian Presley) and Jamal's (50 Cent, billed as Curtis Jackson) squad goes on foot pursuit of the terrorists who ambushed them. Tommy gets shot in the leg and sees his best friend's brains splattered in front of him. Jamal accidentally kills a woman. He also takes a hard tumble and injures his back. Dr. Will Marsh (Samuel L. Jackson) escapes physically unharmed but bears psychic wounds that cause him to turn to the bottle.

These demons don't get exorcised upon coming back to family and friends. Vanessa has trouble adjusting to using a prosthetic hand and feels distant from her boyfriend Ray (Jon Bernthal). In a scene with dialogue so clunky you can hear it hit the floor, Tommy learns that his boss at the gun shop didn't hold his job while he was serving. He bristles at those, such as his father, who don't understand why he's so moody and unambitious. Jamal is angry that a former girlfriend won't talk to him and that his discharge papers keep getting hung up in the bureaucracy. Will self-medicates and lashes out at his wife and rebellious son.

Although packed with enough material for four films, HOME OF THE BRAVE starves each character's story and tells none of them well. Jamal's storyline is the most anorexic and may end up confirming in some viewers' minds the worst stereotypes of combat vets. Vanessa and Tommy fare a little better, but they're done the injustice of having a laughing fit-inducing conversation at a movie theater that is ripped from the Lazy Screenwriting 101 textbook.

Returning to domestic life from the frontline must be incredibly hard. There's no way those back home can understand the awful things witnessed or committed in defending freedom. Now magnify that with an ambivalent or underappreciative population. HOME OF THE BRAVE pursues the noble goal of conveying empathy for those who have seen combat. How unfortunate then that Mark Friedman's screenplay tries to fulfill its purpose with hoary clichés and the grace of someone trying to get out of quicksand.

Grade: D

Eragon

ERAGON (Stefen Fangmeier, 2006)

ERAGON tells of how the sky was once dotted with dragons and their riders. Many years ago a lone rider turned on the others, nearly wiping dragons from the face of the earth. While the evil King Galbatorix (John Malkovich) terrorizes the poor people of Alagaesia, a dragon's egg is protected until it can be delivered to the chosen one who will lead the rebellion.

The Alagaesian savior comes in the form of poor teenage farmer Eragon (Edward Speleers). He doesn't realize what he's found when he stumbles upon what looks like a supersized blue jelly bean in the woods. To Eragon's surprise, a blue dragon named Saphira (voice of Rachel Weisz) emerges from the oblong curiosity.

Saphira matures at an unusually rapid pace. During her first flight she transforms into a fully grown dragon, although more time must pass before she can breathe fire. Dragons pick their riders, so Saphira is able to communicate telepathically with Eragon. The bond is so deep between human and beast that if a rider is killed, the dragon also dies.

Word of Eragon's new pet reaches Brom (Jeremy Irons), an outspoken peasant and former rider. He trains the seventeen-year-old Eragon as they journey to join forces with the Varden rebels. Meanwhile, the sorcerer Durza (Robert Carlyle) dangles the captive Princess Arya (Sienna Guillory) to pull Eragon from his task in hopes of killing him.

ERAGON borrows liberally from the STAR WARS and THE LORD OF THE RINGS universes. Character arcs and scenes parallel the film's inspirations with such fidelity that it plays like an expensive, yet strangely joyless, home video made by fans. It's not too reductive to say that Eragon is Luke Skywalker, Brom is Obi-Wan Kenobi, and so on and so forth. ERAGON seems proud to reference George Lucas and Peter Jackson's definitive films but doesn't recognize that it fails to measure up in comparison. (For all I know, the same is true of the source novel.)

Lucas drew upon Joseph Campbell's writings and Akira Kurosawa's THE HIDDEN FORTRESS, but he also created something of his own. Earnestly acted and directed, ERAGON has neither the visual dazzle nor narrative momentum to compensate for its cut-rate fantasy mimicry. Genre fans might be willing to overlook the plodding plotting if the movie looked, for lack of a better word, cool. First-time feature director Stefen Fangmeier's background is as a visual effects supervisor at Industrial Light & Magic, but the company's FX work for ERAGON is far from state of the art.

Fangmeier might know how to put together effects sequences, but he and his screenwriters are woefully inept in telling the story with visuals and dialogue. ERAGON opens with excessive voiceover narration and overuses blank reaction shots of dragon and rider listening to each other's thoughts. Most of the dialogue is laughable. There are also snickers to be had at the expense of the king's army, which resembles leftovers from a Capital One credit card commercial.

Speleers' screen debut doesn't give one reason to believe he merits another role. He's uncharismatic, never a good thing for a film's anchor, and forgettable. ERAGON boasts an impressive supporting cast, but what's the point in using terrific ingredients to make something that tastes stale when it's fresh?

Grade: D

Other scribblings

While I slowly lose my sanity going to screenings during the December onslaught, why not check out some of my other writings?

I have a review of the game Would You Rather...?: Pocket Travel Version at Nights and Weekends.com. If you'd like to see some of my movie reviews with a nice orange gradation background, Kristin has republished some of my film writings originally posted here in the last couple months. If that's not enough incentive, at least one has been trimmed for length.

And if you didn't check them out before, you can read my attempt at humor writing with The Disclaimer. There's also my review of Douglas Coupland's novel JPod.

If I can find the time and energy, I may have a music review there soon.

And now it's time for me to collapse...

And so it begins...

Awards season has been in full swing, maybe not for quite a month but close to it. As a voting member of the Central Ohio Film Critics Association and Online Film Critics Society, I've seen screeners pile up outside my door and endured what seems like a neverending screening schedule of awards hopefuls.

Today the first list of winners appeared courtesy of the National Board of Review. Awards season should be a simple matter of critics honoring what they believe to be the best, but to a certain extent it has been perverted into an Oscar prognostication game. In part that's what I think the NBR is trying to do, although since their only claim to fame is being first out of the gate, I can't say I take their winners all that seriously.

That doesn't mean the winners aren't deserving--some are--or that their choices have to line up with my preferences. Not at all. I find it a little fishy that all of the films Fox Searchlight has promoted with awards screeners earned mentions in one category or another, but just because they've worked hard to sell voters on their films doesn't mean there's anything wrong with that. (The studio has two other titles that I expect will arrive in my mail once they are closer to theatrical release.)

The most glaring omission from the Best Films list is DREAMGIRLS. I've seen the perceived Oscar frontrunner, but I'm not making a judgment call on whether it should or shouldn't be there. (With embargo rules these days, I'm not sure if I can say what I think of the film, so I'll withhold comment. I would be stunned if the Academy doesn't go for it, though.) I'm just saying that its absence is notable, not that it means the film's prospects are damaged.

Entertainment writers pore over these awards as though they're trying to divine fortunes from tea leaves. But what difference should the NBR's list make in regard to the Academy Awards? For that matter, what impact should any of them have? The critical bodies and AMPAS don't overlap, so why is it taken for granted that what the critics of the nation honor will affect the Academy Award nominations?

Voting on year-end awards is fun to do, although it's a lot more effort than you'd think. (Yeah, I know. Boo hoo.) I know I'm not nominating or voting with any agenda in mind other than bringing to attention the work I found to be the year's best. If the films are well-known, so be it. If they're obscure, that's fine too, although chances are not enough people will agree with me to matter.

I can hear the avalanche of lists on the way. If you don't like what the NBR has announced, don't worry. Something completely different will probably turn up soon.

Idlewild

IDLEWILD (Bryan Barber, 2006)

André Benjamin and Antwan Patton of OutKast star in IDLEWILD, a hip-hop musical set in 1935. The two play childhood friends Rooster and Percival. Patton is the bootlegging understudy Rooster, who helps run and stars on the stage of the ironically named juke joint Church. Benjamin is Percival, a mortician's son and sensitive piano player whose nights are spent banging the keys in the house band at Idlewild, Georgia’s den of iniquity.

The cocksure Rooster faces trouble when a new gangster takes a murderous path to becoming the top crime boss in town. Meanwhile, Percival shyly goes about helping the club’s new singer.

IDLEWILD overflows with inventiveness and random weirdness that sort of make it a must-see even if it isn’t a particularly good film. Benjamin duets with a wall of cuckoo clocks, and Rooster’s flask talks to him. Director Bryan Barber has lensed several OutKast videos and Christina Aguilera’s retro-futurist “Ain’t No Other Man”. His eye for terrific visuals is enhanced by some of the most stunning production and art design in any film this year.

IDLEWILD is snappily paced, and the songs, largely drawn from 2003’s SPEAKERBOXXX/THE LOVE BELOW, keep things moving when the story drags. The problem is that the story is so superfluous that there’s little to no dramatic tension in the film, turning it into a glorified long form music video.

There’s also surprisingly little comedy, one aspect of OutKast’s albums that is sorely missed. The group has been rumored to be on the verge of breaking up since they released the double album that functioned virtually as dual solo albums. The film won’t do anything to dash such talk. The two rarely share scenes and seem to inhabit different films.

Unfortunately, Benjamin’s section is out of tune with the performer’s voice. (Strangely, the film also does the same thing with its veteran performers. Patti LaBelle and Ben Vereen appear but aren’t given any moments to strut their stuff.) He oozes energy, charisma, and humor, qualities that are absent in his downbeat storyline. It’s not until the end credits that he gets to cut loose in a Busby Berkeley-like number that beats every performance scene in IDLEWILD. If more of this Dirty South spin on MOULIN ROUGE had tapped that fun side, it might have been something else.

Grade: C-

For Your Consideration

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION (Christopher Guest, 2006)

Oscar fever spreads among the cast of HOME FOR PURIM, the film within a film in director Christopher Guest's FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION. Internet rumors suggest that Marilyn Hack (Catherine O'Hara) may be delivering a performance worthy of an Academy Award nomination. Like a runaway freight train, Oscar buzz builds around a little film that no one wanted to be involved with in the first place.

Victor Allan Miller (Harry Shearer) believes that his days of being best known for wearing a wiener costume in a TV ad may finally be behind him. Callie Webb (Parker Posey) dreams of becoming Hollywood's new ingenue, which would rescue her reputation after her failed one woman show. Only Callie's boyfriend, fellow actor Brian Chubb (Christopher Moynihan), is left out of the awards talk.

On a fundamental level FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION misunderstands how Oscar season works. With year-round Academy Awards discussion on websites and daily entertainment programs and in magazines, it's possible that the audience knows more about the meat grinder of nominations and awards than the film demonstrates. How Guest and co-writer Eugene Levy could get it this wrong is perplexing.

The Oscar chatter begins while HOME FOR PURIM is in production and alters the course of the film. The actors change how they work, and the studio executives question elements they now consider to be too ethnic. It's fair to assume that movies designed as awards bait undergo such internal tinkering to maximize their gold statuette haul, but significant talk of Academy Awards and actively run campaigns don't take place before a film has completed shooting.

Factual errors aside, FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION is a funny movie, albeit a minor one alongside Guest's other comedies. The biggest laughs come courtesy of Fred Willard. The scene stealer bulldozes his way through his screen time as Chuck Porter, the co-host of an ACCESS HOLLYOOD clone. With his bleached fauxhawk and disregard for what his co-host or interviewees have to say, Willard's Porter is hilariously smarmy and insincere like his real-life counterparts. The force of Willard's performance sort of blows Jane Lynch off the screen, but she does a funny riff on the statuesque women who also host these shows.

O'Hara, another regular in Guest's mock docs, is quite good as the actress who lets the Oscar rumors overinflate her expectations after a career's worth of lousy and forgettable roles. She milks all she can from Marilyn's ridiculous botox and silicon makeover, although the joke seems a little broad for Guest's usually understated approach.

Some critics have accused Guest's previous films, such as BEST IN SHOW and A MIGHTY WIND, of having contempt for the characters, but it's felt more strongly in FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION. There's a detectable bitterness toward the people in the industry, yet the targets, minor veteran performers and starry-eyed up-and-comers, don't seem deserving of the director's anger. A better film would have let the air out of the big stars and directors in positions to nurture projects made primarily to boost their egos.

While FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION is funnier than a large percentage of Hollywood comedies, there are signs that Guest's formula is losing its potency; however, the writer/director can take heart that he won't need to worry about sullying himself in this winter's awards scrum.

Grade: B-

Deja Vu

DEJA VU (Tony Scott, 2006)

Director Tony Scott has never been one to play it safe, sometimes to his own detriment, but his risk-taking opening to DEJA VU seems pretty bold even for him.

Set in a post-Hurricane Katrina New Orleans, the film begins with the terrorist bombing of the Canal St. ferry transporting families and Naval officers to a Fat Tuesday celebration. Before the bomb goes off Scott lingers on shots of men in uniform happy to be on release and bored children waiting to get to their destination. Amid the chaos of the explosion, the director shows burning sailors leaping from the boat. None of this is new, but considering the setting and who is involved, the matter-of-fact depiction of members of a branch of the armed services being killed is kind of shocking in a mainstream action movie.

ATF agent Doug Carlin (Denzel Washington) is assigned to the case. During his investigation he's tipped off to the murder of Claire Kuchever (Paula Patton). Her body washed ashore around the time of the explosion. It is assumed she was one of the more than five hundred passengers on the ferry, but the timing doesn't work out. Someone wants investigators to believe she was onboard, meaning that if he can find Claire's murderer, Doug can find whoever is responsible for blowing up the ferry. Stranger yet, Claire tried to contact Doug before her death.

At first glance DEJA VU appears to be a conventional Denzel Washington action movie, but there are some major surprises in store for viewers thinking they walked into a standard police procedural. Agent Andrew Pryzwarra (Val Kilmer) asks Doug to join his new, top secret unit working on the case. This team possesses tools that take the film into the realm of science fiction, a direction not hinted at in the promotions for the film. It's essentially impossible to review DEJA VU without spoiling this central element, a twist I thoroughly enjoyed, so those who don't want it ruined should continue reading at their own peril.

Pryzwarra's team of braniacs has harnessed the ability to see whatever happened four days ago. It's far too complicated to explain, but suffice it to say that as long as they know where to look, they can see whatever was happening as it occurred in the past. It's not perfect. There are no second chances or rewind options, and the areas covered are limited by satellite placement.

The fantasy technology deepens DEJA VU'S resonance and makes the New Orleans setting all the more appropriate and poignant. Would being able to see into the past and send messages to people there allow us to avoid catastrophes, or would everything play out the same way because we've already done those things that have brought us to that point? It's the main conundrum in time travel movies, but this fascinating riddle gives DEJA VU an unexpected thoughtfulness. (The Beach Boys' "Don't Worry Baby" also gains some weight from its use in a pivotal scene.)

Scott's manic style is well matched with the technology's constant scanning. The technique reaches its apotheosis in a thrilling scene in which Doug gets in a car chase with a suspect whose actions were four days earlier.

As usual Washington is charismatic and projects an honorable core akin to Jimmy Stewart. It tends to be forgotten that the venerable Stewart also played his share of oddball roles, like in his darker work with Alfred Hitchcock. With DEJA VU and this year's INSIDE MAN, it's fun to watch Washington cut loose a little within his upstanding characters.

An unforeseen mix of action, sci-fi, and even a hint of romance, DEJA VU'S pleasures are in delivering what we don't see coming.

Grade: B

Bobby

BOBBY (Emilio Estevez, 2006)

As writer and director of BOBBY, Emilio Estevez tries his hand at an Altmanesque drama detailing the fictionalized goings-on at the Ambassador Hotel on June 6, 1968, the day of the California Presidential primary. Before the day was done, Robert F. Kennedy would be assassinated.

Sporting a cast that includes practically half of Hollywood, it's the kind of film that might as well introduce each of the actors with the "...and so-and-so" credit, the billing that name actors get when their involvement amounts to glorified cameos. Estevez spoons out the twenty-two recognizable faces with such regularity that it seems like an extended joke about ensemble films.

BOBBY meanders among the hotel's employees and guests in the build-up to the campaign's election night party. Along for the ride are Christian Slater as a racist running the hotel's kitchen; Freddy Rodriguez as a kitchen staff member who isn't allowed to leave work to vote or attend that night's Dodgers game; William H. Macy as the hotel manager, who's married to Sharon's Stone's hairdresser and having an affair with a switchboard operator played by Heather Graham; Lindsay Lohan and Elijah Wood as a couple marrying so he can avoid the front line in Vietnam; and Ashton Kutcher as a hippie who introduces two Kennedy staffers to LSD.

That's just a sampling of the enormous cast. Missing among this is any sense of what any of it has to do with Bobby Kennedy. That's kind of a big oversight. After all, the film is named after him. While it includes excerpts of some RFK speeches, BOBBY provides no insight into the man and his politics, choosing instead to flit among the insipid soap opera storylines. There's no time to develop any of the characters, and the time spent with them is a waste. Helen Hunt delivers a monologue about the importance of shoes to women. Laurence Fishburne talks about cobbler and America. These are just a couple of the howlers in a movie that intends to be A Serious Film.

Estevez's point may be that these are the people Kennedy would have represented and helped if he had not been killed, but with an overpopulated cast and undercooked characterization, BOBBY struggles to attach greater meaning to the insignificant stories he tells.

Grade: D

Deck the Halls

DECK THE HALLS (John Whitesell, 2006)

Christmas is a time for generosity and goodwill...or it's supposed to be. In DECK THE HALLS the season becomes a war of holiday cheer between neighbors.

Optometrist Steve Finch (Matthew Broderick) is the Christmas guy in his quaint Massachusetts town. His rootless childhood has Steve determined to make Christmas special, even if it means overcompensating with a long checklist of annual family traditions. Everyone wears the same hideous sweater for the Christmas card photo. Steve has a special area at a nursery where he grows perfect trees for several Christmases to come. He leads a merry band of carollers in his neighborhood.

Yep, Christmas is Steve's time to shine until car salesman Buddy Hall (Danny DeVito) moves in across the street. Buddy longs for one thing to make him feel special. He finds his calling when his daughters show him a tool similar to Google Earth that allows homes to be seen from space. Buddy's new house is obscured from view, so he makes it his mission to decorate it with Christmas lights and geegaws that can be visible from the heavens.

Buddy's gaudy display of lights, a live Nativity scene, and thumping music rubs Steve the wrong way for a couple reasons. The late night noise and illumination make it nearly impossible to sleep. More critically, Buddy's decorating captures the town's imagination, and he begins to overtake Steve as the Christmas guy. Steve won't stand for it and plots to sabotage Buddy's work.

As with many modern Christmas movies, DECK THE HALLS is a comedy of misplaced priorities. It's built around the notion that our quest to succeed--to have the Norman Rockwell family or get people to take notice of us--often results in losing perspective and getting further away from our goals. Steve is so adamant about creating Christmas traditions that they don't possess any joy for him or his family. Buddy gains media exposure and the admiration of the town's population, but he risks losing his wife and daughters.

Of course, these overachieving suburban dads are supposed to be funny as they engage in a game of one-upmanship and revenge. A few laughs are sprinkled in this equivalent of a lame sitcom holiday episode, but the broad comedy and treacly ending are unlikely to put anyone in the Christmas spirit.

Certainly the holidays can be a stressful time, but as with CHRISTMAS WITH THE KRANKS, DECK THE HALLS presents Christmas as a time of nasty competitiveness. It would be nice if movie execs realized that for most people the day, whether a religious or secular celebration, isn't about outdoing everyone or Christmas card perfection. If they could put a good Christmas movie or two in our theaters' stockings each year, we'd appreciate it.

Grade: D+